While both men and women struggle with money and debt, some studies suggest that the ways in which the sexes deal with financial matters vary considerably. And understanding how we interact with money may help us improve our relationship.

Classic Financial Mistakes Women Make

A recent Forbes article outlines some financial behaviors many women engage in – without realizing how harmful they may be to us.

• Shopping away the stress: Whether it takes the form of hitting the mall to blow off steam or “treating yourself” to a small purchase after a difficult day, emotional spending can have disastrous effects on your budget (see the study below). Take notice of the reasons you shop – and see if you can’t replace a buying session with a good talk.
• Nurturing & nesting: Our emotional relationship to money goes beyond impulse buying – research suggests that, because women are often in charge of decorating the home, we tend to link buying “stuff” with taking care of our families. Plus, we may be more likely to lend money to friends and family as a way of nurturing them.
• Losing track of spending: At some income levels, you don’t have to worry about a lunch date here and a new sweater there – but for most of us, small purchases add up quickly. Your credit card bill should not be the first time you realize exactly how many “little things” you bought in a month.
• Not being a “money person”: While most women handle day-to-day household budgets with no problem, many of us fail to pay enough attention to long-term money matters, like investing and saving for retirement.
• Ignoring the wage gap: New numbers from the Census Bureau show that women earn just 77 percent of what their male counterparts do, but it seems many women don’t acknowledge this pay gap. You can begin to correct this shortfall by researching the average salary for work you do and approaching your boss if your salary doesn’t measure up.
• Thinking like a “princess”: Even if Cinderella and Snow White were your favorites as a child, it’s important to recognize now that no man will come along and “rescue” you from your current life – financially or in any other way. Aspiring to a fairytale life will leave you disappointed, could hamper your sense of self-worth as an earner and achiever, and leave you with so much debt you end up filing bankruptcy.

The good news is that none of these flaws has to be a permanent fixture of femininity. By understanding how we behave toward money, we can help ourselves improve our financial smarts and take steps toward better relationships with money.

Additional Resources

Study – Compulsive Buying: A Phenomenological Exploration (PDF)

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